What if We Loved Like We’ve Never Been Hurt?
A social media meme popped into my newsfeed a few days ago that said “love like you’ve never been hurt.”
Meow.
I felt that one.
A simple statement you could read many times, and yet because of the unique chemistry of circumstance and synchronicity in my life and intimate relationships, that statement plucked a string in the heart chord of my emotional anatomy, and I paused.
I absorbed the energy of the words into my body as a felt-sense inquiry into the places I’ve been practicing love in my life and relationships from a place of self-defense, or an avoidance of being hurt.
All those little places where I resist or hold off on speaking those little (or not so little) truths, desires, and appreciations, because I fear that if I speak them…
…I’ll be judged for how much I feel or care, and/or feel embarrassed because my level of intensity or desire doesn’t match that of the other person…
…I’ll be rejected, ghosted, or shut down in the expression of my truth/desire/appreciation, and then go into a shame spiral of self-judgment for both the existence of my desire, and the stupidity of my choice to express it…
…I’ll realize that I was totally misperceiving the situation and realize that I can absolutely NOT trust my intuitive impulses and it’s just better to hide in a hole of isolation, disconnection, self-censorship, and constant second-guessing myself because then at least I don’t run the risk of being rejected…
Whoa. Yeah. There it is.
The fear of being rejected.
That Collective wound that impacts so many of us on such a deep, tender, young level of awareness, that often we build up walls and coping strategies to connection over such a gradual and sustained period of time we don’t even see them for what they are.
And it hit me.
There are still those little (and not so little) places where I hold myself and my love back in relationships because I’m afraid of not being received in my love.
I am still realizing the places where I fear I am too much and as a result not fully embodying the truth of my desire because I might…
