Musings of an Intimacy Expert — Episode 1
I had an amazing session with a client today. He showed up and walked in the door to my office. I was brewing tea for us as I usually do before we sit down. He looked at me and said “I want to do something different today. I want to grab a coffee, roll a spliff and go on a walk with you”.
I smiled, said great, and away we went. We are currently approaching the end of a 3-month coaching package together. He signed up with me to find approval for his desires so he could finally create the types of relationships with women that he wanted.
We achieved that goal within a month of working together.
Through getting into his body, and doing work around communicating vulnerably his emotions to women, as well as trusting his ability to lead and take command in relationship, he wound up attracting in a woman that he is experiencing more joy, more intimacy, more freedom and more connection with than he ever thought possible in relationship.
They are moving in together, he quit his job working at a tech company, and now he is starting a new business building boxed sets for converting sprinter vans into fully livable mobile homes. He’s a badass.
So one month into our coaching relationship, the focus changed. He had already released the shame and blocks necessary to attract in his ideal partnership, and now we got to explore other areas of how to create more freedom and expansion in his life.
We walked to a corner café to grab coffee, and then walked to he park and sat on a bench as he rolled a spliff. I sat there, content and smiling that I’ve created a life for myself where my clients ask me to go on smoke walks with them to process and transform their reality. Magic.
We started talking about money. For the first time in his life, he is self-employed, and as he prepares to seek investment from colleagues and friends to finance his business — he is realizing that for the first time, he is asking people to invest in HIM.
There was something incredibly confronting about owning and embodying his value in such a way that he could ask someone he respected for a large sum of money, and have such a deep trust in his ability to serve and generate that he could transmit his confidence into the body of the person being asked to invest.
He then reflected back to the day we had our enrollment conversation — nearly 3 months ago. He came out to my office with the intention to share about his current challenges and desires in his life. We spent an hour together talking, me digging and feeling energetically into who he was, what was possible for him, and attuning to how I could serve him.
We got to the point where I was absolutely turned on by the fact that I knew I could support him in getting what he wanted. I felt that truth reverberating deeply in my body, and as I transmitted that truth to him, I told him that it was $5000 to work with me for 3 months.
I held that truth in my body, he looked at me and instantly reacted by saying “No fucking way”. I stayed in my body, holding him in his experience. He softened, and smiled, we stayed in connection, as he processed and realized his own fears arising around investing that much in his own happiness, his own transformation, and not long after, he signed up, paid in full, and the adventure began.
Flashing back to today on the bench, he said the reason that he wound up signing up with me, was because of the way I believe with every fiber of my being that what I had to offer was worth that much. What I have to offer, something that is invisible, yet simultaneously invaluable, was worth that investment (and frankly, it’s worth way more).
He told me that the experience in itself, of witnessing me embodying my value and holding it in the face of his skepticism and reaction, was worth the entire investment. Because now, as he is ready to go out and ask investors for a sum significantly greater than $5000, he has the embodied experience of knowing what it is like to feel someone embodying their value.
He has gone through the process of being able to identify and release the vibration of shame in the moment, which is a major element of the coaching work I do. Shame is the number one energy that blocks us from attract in, creating, and receiving what we want in life.
I smiled at him, and we began walking back to my office. We reached his van, which he now lives in full time, and he thanked me. He reflected that this session was one of the most powerful sessions we’d ever had, because he was willing to be honest about his desire to not be in my office, and to choose a different reality (rather than feeling resentment for doing something he didn’t want to do, or feeling like a victim of his circumstances).
He reflected on the the work that we have done together over the past month, and that the closest thing he’s ever experienced like it was going to church. I smiled, allowing myself to embrace one layer deeper that this *is* spiritual work. This is waking up to the fact that we are the creators, and we are in command of everything that we create in our lives.
We hugged, smiled, thanked each other, me thanking him because of how much I’d learned from his making a request to change up the session. And then we parted ways.
And now I am here, writing a story, about the magic that is my life, as I support others in creating the freedom from fear and self-judgment necessary to create their own rich and vibrant realities that can only occur when they stop hiding, and show the world the greatness of who they truly are.
I am taking on new coaching clients. If you want to learn more about what working together would look like, private message me and we’ll schedule a time to talk. Let’s create.
To learn more about my private coaching, visit www.ariellebrown.com.